JOHN McPAIGN AND A DARKER SHADE OF PALIN

The McCain campaign, what I call McPaign, is about what we expected from the Republicans - again. This time, however, they've modified their tactics to include a darker shade of Palin. What a combination they make - the old warrior-maverick, loyal Bush-voting, lobbyist-favoring, richer than your 1,000 closest friends combined, S&L scandal-laden Senator, and the young and perky, shotgun-toting, moose-gutting, uber-mother, Jesus-loving, take-no-prisoners, thanks but no thanks, came out of nowhere, presidential candidate arm-candy, trophy V.P. puppet.(see note 1) Whew - beat that combo, Obamabiden!!

No matter that everything this duo says is total bull-moose. No matter that they each contradict everything they say. No matter that even the lies they tell, the ones the media has overwhelmingly exposed, just keep getting told. But if you believe the media (a real stretch most of the time), these two are more popular than vanilla ice cream on mom's apple pie. Why? What gives?

Let me put it as delicately as I can: the American voting public has demonstrated twice in the last two presidential elections that they are, um, well - idiots. There; I said it in print. And you know what they say: the third time is the charm. The Republican base loves these two, and maybe the simple fact is that those of us who don't think electing McPaign is a good idea are in the minority. I can't tell you how many friends and relatives are saying - half seriously - that if McPaign is elected, they're leaving the country for someplace where sanity prevails.

The McPaign ticket is based on nationalistic jingoism, loyalty to the wounded warrior, and enthrallment with a tough-talking and folksy female. Forget the facts here - that the economy is beyond the toilet and in the sewer, American jobs are disappearing faster than snickerdoodles at a kids birthday party, the global climate is on a crash course with a world we don't want to live on, the "global war on terror" is a tremendous failure and has put America in a much more dangerous place than ever, and that the ideals and morals - not to mention a little thing like our Constitution itself - have been turned upside down for the benefit of the profit-above-all-else corporations and their puppets. Hey - who cares?? We'll get a President and a V.P. we want to drink a beer with!!

So hang on folks, it's a wild ride that will become even scarier with time. Good luck to all of us!

(Note 1 - a woman friend of mine is responsible for the arm-candy-trophy designations; I would never risk my life by uttering such overt sexist remarks!)